So it happened. My little lady love started Mother’s Day Out last Thursday, and like all things Charlotte-style, it wasn’t short on theatrics. I tend to go all out on things whether that be on emotions, holidays, or life events, so I guess she gets it from her mama. (I mean, her outfits were bought and her school necessities were ordered back in July.) Now let’s talk about the first day.
But can you even handle her smirk? I mean, really.
It was quite the doozy of the week for us, you see. We had just spent the week in Port Lavaca, and we had only been home for a day before she was whisked away to a new environment. Her schedule had been completely thrown off for an entire week prior, so I have to give it to her for being a trooper. We also missed Meet the Teacher that Tuesday due to the funeral. However, we did go by the school to drop off some paperwork the week before, and her teacher just happened to be in the hallway to meet her. Technically, she had a private meet and greet, but she had still never been in the classroom she now calls home twice a week.
The night before she started, I was having a rough time trying to get settled back in to being home after all that had happened. I updated my Facebook status to something like, “Is it normal for my stomach to be in knots the night before Charlotte starts MDO?” I think my stomach was still in knots from everything else, but the thought of my baby leaving me for five whole hours a day twice a week about did me in. What was drop-off going to be like? What was I supposed to pack in her lunch box? What was I forgetting? Then not even five minutes after posting my lame FB status, her teacher called me to answer any last minute questions I had and to calm my fears. I think my very special guardian angel was looking out for me, just like I knew he would. Peace came over me, and I knew I could handle it. We could handle it.
We have been talking about “school” for some time now in our house, and the night before her big day, MJM gave her his best daddy pep talk since he wouldn’t be able to make it for drop off. That night I made sure I had her outfit laid out, her school items labeled, and her necessities all together. I sang to her and read the “going to school” books before bed that night. Once I tucked her in, she fell fast asleep.
Thursday morning, I woke up before she did and prepped her lunch kit with a sandwich, fruit, cheese crackers, and a yogurt. I filled her water bottle up with milk and made sure everything was good to go. Then she woke up, and it was time for her to get dressed. I made her pig tails, and we talked about the day she was about to have: her first day of school.
Is it a bird?
Is it a plane?
“No, Mama. It’s just school.”
I fed her the little breakfast that she’s used to, eggs and toast, and then it was picture time to document the day.
Once we were on our way to the school, I kept praying that she would have a good day. She told me, “I go to school, Mama.” She loves people, but she’s shy and timid, so of course my mama heart worries.
When we made it to the parking lot, her backpack was a little too heavy to carry herself with the lunch kit inside, so I helped her with her things. There were tons of parents coming and going, making Charlotte a little apprehensive. She clinged to me like a little spider monkey. Walking in was no big deal, but making it to her classroom was another story.
“You’re going to leave me, Mama?!”
We were one of the first to arrive to the classroom which gave us a minute to get acquainted with the room and her teachers. Charlotte wanted to make sure I was by her side though. I assured her that she would have a good day full of fun. She obviously didn’t buy it because as soon as I had to leave, waterworks. To be fair, I do think she was spooked by another little boy in her class who was crying his head off already. I wanted to cry with both of them. But I stayed strong, gave her a big hug, and told her I loved her and would be back soon.
I took a deep breath and walked out confidently knowing that she was in good hands. I went back to my car and just sat there in silence. I sat in the parking lot for a good 45 minutes, browsing through social media to distract myself. When I realized I should probably leave, I noticed that I hadn’t cried like I thought I would either. I kept distracting myself with work then lunch with a friend. By the time I knew it, it was time for me to go pick her up.
As I walked up her classroom’s hallway, I could see her playing in the room through the window. I stood outside for a minute to notice her disheveled pig tails and how she was playing with some blocks by her lonesome, but she was content. Once I walked up to the door to sign her out, she caught sight of me, and her tears started back up again. It was a cry of relief that I had come back for her. She couldn’t get into my arms fast enough. Her teacher was so sweet and told me that Charlotte had in fact had a good day, but she didn’t eat much lunch, totally normal on the first day. She also didn’t nap, which I anticipated since she’s a late napper anyway. We walked out holding hands, and then she was happy again. I asked about her day and how she liked it, and she enthusiastically told me she liked school. Her tears must have been for show.
My little baby is growing up, and as painful as that is for me, I’m so proud of her. I’m so proud and thankful to God that He trusted me to be her mom. She’s my joy and light in my life, and with each passing milestone, I know that at least one of us will always be filled with all the emotions.
Let’s keep in touch, shall we?
You can see where I’m linking up on this page.
She looks so darn cute! I know I will be a mess and cry the first day Odette goes to school :( Glad it went so well for the both of you!
Thanks, Kelly! I thought I would be crying my eyes out, but I guess everything else made me numb to it. However, I had no clue what to do with myself while she was gone that first day. I just kind of sat around and twiddled my thumbs. Ha. Now we’re both getting used to it, and I think it will be great. :)
Such a sweet recollection of her first day! Great job mom. As moms it is so hard because it would be so easy to just hold them close under our wing but that is really not our job at all. Helping her to grow slowly into a confident and independent little person one day is the best thing you can ever do for her. Now…grab a starbucks and enjoy your “free” time!
Thanks, Shelly! There are times when I think that keeping her in a bubble sounds like a fantastic idea, but I know I have to let her grow, just like you said. I have definitely enjoyed a Starbucks or two in my time without her, too! Xoxo
I loved reading all about her (and your!) first day of school! I’m so glad she didn’t cry the second day. That’s really great! Some kids in Owen’s 2yr old class cried everyday all the way through to May. It’s real bittersweet watching them grown up :)
Thanks, girlfriend! She almost cried, but held it together. I was so thankful. The class across the hall still had criers the third day, and it’s heartbreaking. Her class is good now. It seems like they’ve all settled in. Makes me so happy! It is bittersweet watching them grow. Time is precious!