photo and mat by Olive Creative Co
The other day one of my follower friends on Instagram asked me how I deal with negativity and negative comments as a blogger. It made me pause, because I would be lying if I said they didn’t bother me…at first. But there’s a whole lot more to it than just that.
One thing I’ve learned in my almost 37 years is this: I cannot control what others think, say, or do. I can only control my reaction. How I react is where it begins and ends. It’s a choice I get to make. Did you hear that, friend? You get to make up your mind on how you choose to react.
There is so much negativity in the world today. From what the media spews our way to what some high school acquaintance says on Facebook to what people comment on your harmless posts. Eye rolls aplenty! But if we choose to be consumed by social media and everyone’s loud opinion, then also consider to choose to drown out the noise, the life-sucking, hate-filled, misery-laden noise.
If something gets under your skin and every ounce of you is boiling, don’t let it stick. It’s that simple. Read it, receive it, and LET IT GO. Vent to your friends, your true friends, and then release the feelings and choose to focus on the positive things around you. Does this mean you’re a doormat? Absolutely not. It means you have more self-love and good sense than to let a wounded soul harm yours. Don’t let the weight of someone else’s misery bring you down because it is NOT yours to carry.
When negativity turns into a bad day…
This whole conversation made me think of a blog post I wrote years ago, “The Secret to Getting Over a Bad Day,” because negativity can most certainly cause a bad day if you let it. It happens. But let’s revisit these thoughts:
You see, bad days are going to happen. Sometimes the cause of a bad day is so minuscule, in retrospect you look back and think, “I was upset about that?” And then there are some days when big stuff happens, life changing stuff, that truly rocks you to your core, like when you find out about a close friend’s or family member’s battle with cancer or when you have a broken heart from grief. That’s heavy. But unfortunately, that’s life. Bad days and bad things happening are inevitable, but we can either dwell on the icky stuff or dwell on hope.
Here’s the good news.
Even when the bad days seem to linger, especially when you’re going through a big thing like I mentioned above, there is still joy to be had in each day. How can that be? Well, we were made to thrive. We were made to persevere. We were made in His image. Because of that, we gather up every ounce of our will to keep going with a positive attitude even when the times are tough.
Our circumstances aren’t always a choice, but our attitude is. Happiness is a choice. You might think that it’s just not that easy. You’re right. It’s not. It’s a constant effort to choose joy, especially in adversity. But the secret to getting over a bad day (or a bad season) is yourself. We choose how we react to situations. We choose how we overcome the little things and the big things that are thrown our way. When we choose to dwell on God instead of our problems, things start to turn around.
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The bottom line…
Negative comments and negative people are a dime a dozen. The enemy is trying desperately to steal your joy. Well you know what? The devil can go and sit on a tack. I choose to be a positive person. I choose to look on the bright side. Do you think I’ve always been that way? Heck no! But did you know that you can do all things through Christ who strengthens you? In the words of Rachel Hollis, “In the same way you can train for a marathon, you can train your mindset to not wallow in negative thoughts… You can train yourself to be anything. Train yourself to seek joy.”
If you want to get over negativity and want to rid the world of it, change yourself! Be the light for others. Be the encouraging voice so we can drown out all the noise. It’s really not that hard. It takes more energy to be miserable than to be happy. Happiness is contagious! And the world needs more happy.
The next time you have a bad day or encounter something negative, just remember that you hold the secret to overcoming it. You can either choose to let the situation define you or refine you. It’s your choice. You’re allowed to have a bad day. You’re just not allowed to stay there.
Be blessed, friends!
Xoxo,
Kristy
