I’m back! There’s no grand announcement or production or count down. I merely dusted off the old interface that is this blog and started typing. I re-entered the world of Instagram a few days ago, and after a five month sabbatical, I can see that not much has changed. Except I did. I’m still the same me, just a little wiser.
affiliate links: sequin duster // graphic tee // leggings // slippers
I thought during my time away that I would still write and share here, but that didn’t happen. Life did, though. Lots of it.
When I shared in Instagram stories, what questions do you have for me, one of the biggest questions was: what did you learn during your time away? You want to know what I learned being OFF social media? Life without Instagram was glorious.
First, let me say that I never left my personal Facebook. I shared the fun memories I want to remember and I shared to keep my family up to date without having to send 100 pictures at a time through a text. It’s fun when you use social media to actually be social. The random scroll down the timeline didn’t bother me, because I’ve kept that feed nice and cheery to my liking.
Instagram is a whole other beast. It’s loud and I follow entirely too many people and accounts (I am working on dwindling that down now). The noise. It’s so loud.
But while I was away, there was peace and quiet. I could hear my own thoughts. I could focus on being present with my family, snapping pictures because I wanted to not because I had to. I could clean my kitchen and do laundry (ha, not really, that’s still a disaster) without distraction.
Here’s my biggest takeaway I learned about myself. I let Instagram get the best of me. I allowed it to. I take full ownership in that. I hate to admit it, but I was trying to find worth through Instagram. I was seeking perfection in myself, and we all know that perfection doesn’t exist. You guys: If you’re looking for worth in an app, you’re doing it wrong.
“For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” Ephesians 2: 8-10 ESV
That’s all we need. Grace is the gift of God. Worthiness is the gift of God. Not a result of works. Only God.
When you strip it down to that, it makes things seem crystal clear and simple. Everything we do should be to glorify His name. He gave us our gifts so that we could walk confidently in them. In His name. Not for likes, not for shares, not for engagement rate. Not for discouragement on a false sense of self. Walk away from what is not holy.
As a blogger turned influencer (and I use that word lightly), I used my Instagram platform for “work” and would get so down on myself when I didn’t “perform” the way I wanted, when I felt like I was spinning my wheels with no reward. Instagram was indeed a job for me, and sometimes we look to our work or job or career to find worth. Have you ever felt that way? Why?
To be completely honest, I am the type of person who gets frustrated when I can’t do it all and can’t do it all well. On the outside looking in, I would say to that, “Bless her heart.” Because thinking you can is not feasible. God equipped us with the armor we need to do what HE has intended us to do, and I sincerely believe and know that He did not intend for us to do it all and do it all at once. That is a lie from the devil, and he can go and sit on a tack.
So now here we are. Sometimes taking a step back gives you the exact perspective you need. I needed the rest. I needed the clarification of who I was and whose I am.
Social media is a brand new beast, and we’re the guinea pigs. It can become toxic, and for some reason, humans are a sucker for suffering. When will we learn?!
Now that I’ve regained my sense of peace, I’m more able to recognize if and when I need to walk away. This break reminded me though that I don’t need to throw it all away, but I am free to take breaks when I need to. One of my friends just shared this quote: “Not everything needs to be perfect to still be wonderful.”
I missed chatting with friends and being social on social media. I missed sharing my outfits to give my fellow sisters some closet inspiration. I missed sharing memes to make you laugh. I missed talking about all the things that make me feel good that could help you feel good too. I missed sharing God’s words. This is part of who I am. These are some of the things that bring me joy.
How dare I let the notion of perfection and people interfering with that joy get the better of me. Not today, satan. Not today.
Here’s to a new year of being brave and bold. In anything and everything we do. Let this be a reminder to you that you are filled with God’s grace. We get it wrong sometimes and things get thrown askew, but God nudges us back onto the path He’s laid out in front of us. It’s ours for the taking. To God be the glory.
