I have a confession to make. Sometimes I feel like social media can be quite the monster in that it causes us to quickly judge others when they post the best parts of their life. Sometimes I catch myself thinking, “Man, they must be living the life. I wish my life was that perfect.” But isn’t all the perfection being passed around only just a façade? How many times do we take just one picture 10 times to make sure we have captured just the right angle, cleaning up the mess in the background, and fixing our hair just right? We’ll even sometimes ask the photographer, “Can I see that picture?” Then looking with disappointment at what was just caught on camera saying, “Nope. Can you take it again?” Or “Don’t post that to Facebook. I look awful.” Then sometimes, we say “Ehh, I can fix it with a filter.” In a society saturated by hundreds of apps and high-tech devices allowing us to use filters for our photographs and thus our life, it makes it easy for us to hide our imperfections. I feel that sometimes we do a good job of hiding behind a filter, making everything look better than what it really is. Myself included—guilty as charged. But maybe instead of thinking that social media is the monster, isn’t the voice inside of us the real monster? Sometimes the idea in our head of what our life should look like interferes with us enjoying our life as it is.
Just the other day, while browsing Facebook, I saw a post by one seriously inspirational blogger, Becky of Scissortail Silk, that had me screaming with joy. She posted a picture of her messy living room and kitchen. No filter. No staging. Just her real life: toys strewn across the floor, laundry on the couch, food scattered on the ground, and her countertops cluttered with dishes. Her words accompanying the picture are what spoke to my heart. She said, “It’s so easy to want life to look a certain way, but more often than not, it doesn’t.” Amen, sister. Lately, Becky’s not the only one sharing her reality. I’ve seen countless friends, bloggers, and even popstars use hastags like #keepingitreal #nofilter #nomakeup #theeverydaymom #realmomlife. I think all of us are in search (to some degree) of seeing people with all of their imperfections brought to the forefront. It’s refreshing to see the un-staged reality in people’s lives, because it’s in our imperfections that we can connect and appreciate what our life is and not what we think others want to see. In all honesty, I don’t think it has anything to do with what we think others want to see, it’s all about what we want others to see. However, I believe the best we can give to this social media society is the truth.
And here’s the truth: Just in case you need reminding, because Lord knows I need this reminder, too: no one’s life is perfect. We each carry our own set of trials and our own set of insecurities. Let’s take myself for example. Sure, I post tons of pictures that I spend a little (or a lot of) time on, especially now that I have this blog. Even though I try my hardest to always be as real as I can, I still love my pretty pictures and I choose to primarily share the positives in my life. Just know that behind all the pretty pictures are stories still left untold. If we’re being honest, we all have stories that we keep inside. Know that the girl behind this blog has just as many problems as the next person. In fact, I’m going to go ahead and step out of my comfort zone, and share with you some of my struggles and insecurities.
with the baby
first
– feeling defeated when things go wrong
Becky went on to say that our life “is simply a beautiful series of ordinary moments sewn together with gratitude and love.” And sometimes that’s all that people want to see or need to see. I know my heart is full of gratitude and love. I hope yours is too. Let’s stop comparing our lives to the pictures of perfection we see and start loving and appreciating our reality, the pretty pictures and the not so pretty pictures. You don’t have to hide, girlfriend. Let’s grant each other the grace in knowing that behind the filter and flawless pictures one portrays is just another person who is searching for the same thing you are: to love the life God has given them, insecurities and all. Even if it took them 10 tries to get that perfect photo on Instagram. Know that there’s a story behind each picture out there that you see. It’s just a snapshot of someone’s world, not the whole story. Appreciate the pretty pictures and the honest ones, too. Grace: it’s the gift that keeps on giving. Let’s give some to ourselves and to others.
I love seeing the real life photos, too. I can appreciate a pretty picture for it's aesthetic value, but I connect with a picture that tells a real story. Blogs that show a whole person with good and not so good moments are the ones that make me want to come back. Thanks for sharing!
I love beautiful pictures, especially when they tell a story. I tend to gravitate to story-tellers as well, the bloggers who tell the good moments and the not so good moments, too. But I do love fashion bloggers, and sometimes that's where the insecurity can creep in. Then I remember it's their job to look so put together all the time! ;)
Thanks for stopping by again, Marie!
Such an inspirational post. It's so hard to get caught up in being a Pinterst worthy mama and other rabbit holes of social media. Which is honestly so silly because we all have struggles in our own way. Thank you for being so honest!
Thanks so much for your kind words, Amanda. :) Have a wonderful weekend!
Amen sister! Beautiful post :) I just love your point of view on everything and you took the words right out of my mouth! Xoxo love reading your blog the good the bad and all the in between!
I find myself wanting to share more of the less perfect parts if my life lately too but I'm having trouble sharing without seeming negative or ungrateful! I just always want to be real above all, because nobody's perfect!
Thanks so much, Tawnya! Your words mean so much. :) I love your blog as well, so to hear that you love mine is such a blessing! :)
As far as what we share…for me, it's all about finding a balance, don't you think? I'm more of a silver-linings kind, so as long as I'm sharing that aspect on things, being honest is what I'll be. :)
Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Love it! Awesome message Kris!!
Aww, thank you, Kelley! Miss you, sweet friend!
Love this post! I have never been one of those pinterest type Mommas and my house is almost always messy. It is what it is, right? :)
Oh, yes, I am a Pinterest fanatic but for the pure enjoyment and amazement of the awesome things people create. :) Let me not even get started about my floors in my house. I pray for a maid every day! Lol.
girl. i do the same thing. comparison is the thief of joy…isn't that how the quote goes? i have to remind myself that i'm so so blessed and fortunate and it's okay if i vacuum tomorrow or next week. :) thanks for linking up!
Exactly. It's all about those daily reminders. :) And a vacuum? We're supposed to use those? Lol. Thanks so much for your linkup. Next week, I'll keep it short with five things instead of a diatribe. ;)
This is so true. Social media gives us an opportunity to put our best foot forward. We choose what to share and what everyone sees, leaving behind all life's imperfections behind. It is so nice and refreshing when I read posts from people who are keeping it real. Thanks for the honesty!
That's why I think it's okay every now and then to show an unfiltered, unedited snapshot into our world every now and then. Thank you so much for stopping by, Crystal!
Crystal, I love your comment and obviously Kristi's blog. I feel the same way, I am more drawn to reality, real life, real strugges, triumphs and failures, pictures and stories that share trails, failures dissapoinments and the not so good— balanced with a postitive ending and an attitude and a heart of gratitude for the present, those around us and our environment. There are too many people struggling to become better or improve their lives at home, family and just life. And unfortunately for many these days, there are individuals who do not have what maybe others are excelling, succeeding or expressing on facebook and social media. Even though my marriage and family is amazing and we share more great times than not…i personaly choose not to focus so much on picture perfect outings etc of us because I know all to real that in reality there are hurting families, individuals, relationships, marriages, neighbors and friends whom struggle daily with this and it only opens their wound and dampens their spirit a little deeper when all the media or photos show exhilariating moments, picture perfect platforms. Honestly, I struggle with wanting to stay connected with friends and family because we have all of that and more with social media. I try to limit my time on FB and social media and share more of what may help someone versus my stuff, my family, my outings, my dates…or at least that is my intention–whether it be one or many individuals that God touches through me. I do however believe with bloggers it's different. It is a specail calling like, for Kristi. I absolutely love her blogs, her eloquently put togther words, and grammatically correct sentences etc. She is gifted with writing and expressing herself and her love for writing. God has blessed her pen for writing or shoudl i say keys… Her thoughts and blogs are in my opinion beautiful and balanced. Kristy excellent blog– real and keeping it real every now and then is benefitting to many. Thank you for sharing and your openess. Hugs
Thanks so much for your kind words. :) Hope you have a wonderful weekend!
Isn't this the truth?!! Since social media makes everything so public, it's hard not to try to make your own life appear perfect and "jealous-worthy". Why do we care so much? It's hard to find beauty in the dirty dishes piling up, or the screaming toddler who won't go to bed! LOL But yes, it's definitely looking at the bigger picture. Thank you for sharing!
Oh, man. I hope I never come across as wanting to make life appear perfect! Lol. I know that's never my intention. And since I always try to see the best in people, I would like to think that most people are just trying to spread a little joy with pretty pictures. So when I do see the not so glamorous shots, I think to myself, "Hey, they're just like me!" :) Thanks so much for reading and have a great weekend!
Yes, this is so true! This is why I called my blog "weak and loved." I feel like there are plenty of people who are— no, who TRY to be- "strong and awesome" all the time. :) I'm ready to just be ME. Imperfect, but loved by God anyway.
Exactly, Emily! The older I get, the more comfortable I feel in my own skin. And it's crazy to think that God loves us just the way we are. :)
I love this post Kristy! The whole social media marketing game is crazy and silly, but I will be the first to admit that I can get just as caught up in it as the next person. What you said about taking 10 photos of the same thing to get just the perfect one is so true. How much time do we waste scrolling through, editing, deleting and perfecting our images? I am a designer. I appreciate pretty pictures, but I also appreciate honesty and the beauty that is in the REAL.
Thanks so much for that, Megan! I agree 100%. Like that "silly" picture on top, it took about 3 times to get that shot. Lol. I'm right there with you about the pretty pictures, especially from photographers, big time bloggers, and the like. But more often than not, the REAL pictures are where it's at. ;)
I love the no filter!! I think even when I try and stage things for my posts something always sneaks in…like a toy or a kitchen rag :-/
Thanks so much for sharing on this week's #SHINEbloghop
Thank you! I do too. :) Seriously. If I want to take a picture that I'm staging, something always gets in the way. Lol.
I agree with you about Social Media!!! I absolutely think you are stunning! Filter or no filter! :)
Aww, Leslie! Thanks so much! :)
Beautiful post! Thanks for linking up to Mamas Tell All!
Thank you, Christine! I was happy to join y'all.
I absolutely love this! It really just puts it all into perspective doesn't it! We need to post the real us more often and not get caught up in how 'perfect' every other mum may seem. Because, really, we are all the same, feeling the same pressures of being perfect! Thank you for the reminder :)
Thanks, Rachel! It really does. Sharing the good days and the bad days is all part of who we are. ;)